


shooting at the walls of heartache (bang bang)

by SaraJaye



Category: Fire Emblem: Kakusei | Fire Emblem: Awakening
Genre: Actual Noire Anger, Bloody Injuries, F/F, Helpless Noire, Mild Hurt/Comfort, Noire Takes A Level In Badass Mentally, Protective Severa, Recklessness, Taking The Bullet, Waiting By Her Bedside
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-03-12
Updated: 2014-03-12
Packaged: 2018-01-15 10:52:15
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,780
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1302208
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SaraJaye/pseuds/SaraJaye
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Noire's always leaned on Severa, Severa's always let her and both expected it to stay that way forever.</p>
            </blockquote>





	shooting at the walls of heartache (bang bang)

For as long as she could remember, Severa had always looked after her. Defending her when anyone teased her, protecting her when one of the other kids got too rough while they were playing, sitting by her bedside while she was sick. When her father died Severa had let her cry on her for hours, and waited outside the door of her room for her to wake up after she'd passed out from the shock of watching her mother die three years later.

Severa wasn't always the nicest person in the world, even before her parents died. Even Noire wasn't completely immune to her grumpiness, but she always noticed Severa tried harder to keep it under control around her. Likewise, Noire's alternate self never came out to play with Severa.

So Noire grew attached to the other girl, learned to feel safe with her. When she was scared, she crawled under Severa's blankets and clung to her until the shadows passed or the storm stopped. When she was upset, she cried on Severa's shoulder as long as she'd let her. Even after they came back to the past and Noire promised to become stronger and less of a burden, she always found herself falling back into her old habits. _Severa, will you walk me to the bathroom? Severa, stay with me while I re-string my bow, please? Severa, please protect me during this battle!_

And Severa always gave in. It was just the way things were, the way they always had been and they'd probably never change no matter how much stronger Noire got. There was no reason for them to, really, Severa liked feeling needed and Noire could be just as strong and helpful firing arrows from behind her.

The morning of the first confrontation with Walhart they readied their weapons while Gerome's father obsessively polished everyone's armor until it shone. Severa approved, Noire didn't care much either way. They followed Say'ri and Chrom into battle, listened to Robin's strategy and took their places.

It was like any other battle. _Was_ being the key word; Severa fought up close with her sword and her axe, Noire shot any stragglers that got too close. A typical battle, both girls playing their typical roles.

Neither of them saw the wyvern rider coming at them from a distance, its axe gleaming and headed straight for Noire. Archers were like candy to the enemy on the battlefield, unable to defend themselves from up close it was too easy for them to be surrounded and possibly done in. The whoosh of wings alerted her and she barely had time to nock an arrow before she felt herself being shoved out of the way; the ground was hard under her and she cried out, losing her grip on her bow. Severa fell to the ground moments later, holding her side and gasping in pain.

" _No!_ " Before Noire had time to react Cordelia came flying towards them at near-impossible speed, landing and rushing to her daughter's side. "No, no, no..." Severa tried to say something but was overcome by a cry of pain and Cordelia was gathering her up and mounting again, rushing her daughter off the field and into the medics' tent. And Noire was left sitting beside her fallen bow, watching the battle around her.

_She protected me._ Blood stained the ground where Severa had stood just moments ago, blood spilled by the enemy that had tried to kill _her_ before Severa...

Noire shook her head, abandoned her bow and dashed towards the medical tent, tears stinging her eyes. She couldn't think, she could barely breathe and as she collapsed outside the tent the image of Severa falling played in her mind on an infinite loop.

-x-

"-deep cut," she later overheard her father whisper when she woke up, "she's in bad shape now but luckily she didn't lose too much blood, she just needs to rest and take it easy for a few days. She'll be back to her old self in no time." Relief flooded Noire, _she's alive, she's going to be okay._ Cordelia and Gregor spent a few moments watching Severa sleep before going back to their own tent, and when they did Noire shyly approached her father.

"Um...can I sit with her for a while, please?" she asked.

"Of course. She'll likely be asleep for a long time, though," Libra cautioned.

"That's fine." Severa had waited by her bedside more times than Noire could count, this was her chance to return the favor. She sat down in the chair beside the sickbed, watching the other girl sleep. She wore a huge bandage across her middle and she looked smaller without her armor and Noire wanted to cry. _It was my fault, she protected me, I'm the reason she's hurt and I would've been the reason she died out there if her mother hadn't gotten to us in time. I was weak, I was scared, she had to protect me. She always has to protect me._

But as time went on, the more she looked at Severa and her bandage and watched blood seep into the white, something inside her began to change.

_She's always protecting me...but this time she didn't have to! I had the arrow ready! I could have shot him at a close range! I may be weak and helpless most of the time, but I've always been good with my bow!_ Severa laid on the bed with a bloody bandage across her middle, a bandage she shouldn't have needed, and Noire clenched her fists. _There was no reason for her to get hurt._ Anger slowly began to heat her up, not the usual sudden rages that came with her other self but a calm, serious anger at both Severa for being so reckless and at herself for making Severa feel like she had to be.

_No more. There was no reason for her to get hurt, but she did. Because of me. No more of this._

-

"Owww..what the hell happened out there?" Noire's head shot up; during the four hours she'd been sitting there she'd only nodded off twice, and Severa's voice had just prevented a third time. Seeing Severa look so tired and out of it nearly melted her anger until she remembered _why_ Severa was so tired and out oh it.

"You got hurt," Noire said, trying to keep her voice tight. "Your mother flew you here before you bled too much."

"Oh, yeah...yeah, now I remember. That guy was coming for you and you would've been mincemeat," Severa groaned. _Don't remind me,_ Noire thought bitterly.

"I had the arrow ready," she said. "Severa-"

"Don't thank me, it's just me doing what I always do." Severa managed a smile. "Just like always."

"No." The word flew out of her mouth before she could stop it. "Severa, this time you were just _reckless!_ " The other girl actually flinched and Noire immediately felt bad but this time Noire didn't apologize. This wasn't her other side talking, for the first time since forever she was in full control. "You got hurt for _no reason._ "

"Ugh, what are you babbling on about?" Severa rolled her eyes. " _You're_ the one who's always asking me to protect you and babysit you, you're just so _helpless_ -"

"I _know_ that!" Noire snapped. "I-I know that," she repeated, trying to keep calm even as her heart pounded at the sight of Severa's blood. "But this time...this time I could've taken care of it myself. I had the arrow ready." She sighed. "And I know it's also my fault. You're so used to protecting me you couldn't help it, but you still shouldn't have done it!"

"Gawd, Noire..." Severa groaned as she tried to sit up, and Noire gently pushed her back down again. "H-hey, knock it off! Come on, it's just a little gash in my side, you're getting way too worked up!"

"You got lucky this time," Noire said, _you could have been cut so much deeper, lost so much more blood, you could have **died**._ "Severa, I...I appreciate you trying to help me. But it scared me, watching you fall to the ground bleeding like that." She took a deep breath, feeling her anger start to cool as she took Severa's hand. "I know why you did it. But please..." _If you'd died, I don't know what I would do, you're so important to me._ "Please, don't ever do anything like that again."

Severa didn't answer. Noire didn't say anything else. Silence suffocated them and Noire couldn't stop looking at the bandage; blood had stopped spreading across the white but there was still a decent amount there.

"Maybe I was kinda impulsive," Severa finally mumbled. "I mean, I guess you could've taken him down on your own. But he was coming right _at_ you and you were struggling to line up your shot, and I-" She sighed. "I panicked. I couldn't let you get hurt."

"And instead _you_ did. I'm not the only one you worried," Noire said. "Your parents, Cynthia, Lucina...they're all going to be so upset with you after they're done being happy you're all right."

"I'm used to _them_ scolding or being mad at me," Severa said with a shrug. "It's _you_ I didn't expect to get mad. I mean, _really_ mad."

"You've never given me any reason to." Noire sighed. "But...I didn't mean to snap your head off, Severa, and I'm sorry. I just..." She sat down on the edge of the bed, and Severa leaned against her side.

"You went easy on me compared to the tongue-lashings I'm gonna get later," she grumbled. "Sorry I freaked you out." Severa's body relaxed against her and Noire felt her heart and her mind calm down. Severa was hurt, but she was safe and alive and she'd recover just fine.

But she didn't want anything like this to happen again. Ever.

"Severa?"

"Yeah?"

"From now on...let's rely on each other," she said softly, brushing a hand through one of Severa's pigtails. "I want to get stronger, and now...well, I've got more reason than ever! I'll never let you be hurt like that again!"

"Heh." Severa nestled a little closer, smiling. "It's about time." Her usual brusque Severa tone was coming back, and Noire had never been more relieved to hear it. Severa would keep protecting and looking after her, but Noire would grow stronger until she could do the very same for the girl she treasured.

Severa began to doze off again, and Noire leaned down to brush her lips against the other girl's forehead. _Thank you, Severa. For everything._


End file.
